Videos > What is your attachment style?

Hey there! I'm really grateful that you're tuning in today. You know, having someone cheering you on and wishing the best for your life is an incredible feeling, and I want you to know that I'm that person for you. I genuinely believe that you have the potential to grow, learn, and become a powerful force of goodness, inspiration, and motivation in your own life and the lives of those around you.

I get the chance to connect with thousands of you every week, hearing about your concerns, successes, and questions. One topic that often comes up is relationships and friendships. Today, I want to share a tool, a framework, that can help you be more understanding and successful in your personal, school, and family relationships.

Before I dive into it, it's crucial to understand that the information I'm about to share isn't meant to be used as a weapon. It's not about judging others based on their attachment styles—whether they're secure, anxious, or avoidant. Instead, it's about raising awareness and understanding these styles to improve our interactions.

Let's break it down. First, there's the Anxious Style: individuals who love closeness but often fear that their friends or partners don't want the same level of closeness. They can be sensitive to changes in moods and actions, leading them to take things personally.

Then, there's the Avoidant Style: people who value independence and keep relationships at arm's length. They may feel uncomfortable with too much closeness and are watchful for signs of control or loss of freedom.

Lastly, the Secure Style: individuals who feel at ease in warm, caring, and close relationships. They're not overly worried about the status of the relationship and can handle romantic matters without easily getting upset.

Recognizing these styles, even in ourselves, is crucial. It's not about changing who we are but understanding how to function better in our relationships. The key is to approach each other with compassion, realizing that everyone has their unique style, and with a bit of effort, we can work together effectively.

Understanding these styles helps avoid misunderstandings in relationships. For example, an anxious person might misinterpret a secure person's carefree nature as neglect, while the secure person might see the anxious person as too clingy. By understanding each other, we can build stronger, healthier connections.

Why am I telling you all this? Well, research shows that the quality of our relationships significantly impacts our well-being. My hope is that by sharing this knowledge, you can navigate your relationships with confidence and honor. Regardless of your style, strive to create a safe and secure space for others. Remember, not everyone expresses love the same way, and that's perfectly okay.

I hope this insight is helpful to you. If you have any thoughts or questions, feel free to share, and I'll address them in future discussions. Have a fantastic day!