Can being too honest be a bad thing?

Can being too honest be a bad thing?

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Building a strong foundation 

Years ago, a community wanted to build a significant and enduring structure. They wanted a strong and resilient building that would last forever. The work began, of course, with the foundation. After several years of hard work, they discovered that some of the sandstone blocks in the foundation had cracked. They thought about just replacing the fractured blocks, but they made a final decision: they dug out the entire sandstone foundation and replaced it with thick, 16-foot granite footings.

The initial construction and subsequent rebuilding of the foundation alone took 14 years to complete. But as a result of that gargantuan effort, a beautiful building, now the centerpiece of that community, stands today, and will likely stand forever, built upon that solid foundation.

Even now, you are building a foundation for your own life, a foundation for your character, for what you will be known for, and, more importantly, for the kind of person you choose to be. Make no mistake: you are the one who chooses. In this foundation of yours, composed of the granite blocks that will support your life, you may choose to place values and principles such as courage, positivity, friendliness, hard work, compassion, kindness, persistence, gratitude, humility, self-discipline, generosity, selflessness, optimism, and fun.

Hopefully, you will also add honesty and integrity to that list. The type of honesty discussed in this article refers to being sincere, speaking the truth, and admitting mistakes. An honest person follows through on promises and agreements, or at least makes their best effort to do so.

If you want to be an honest person, that means you’ll go to practice if you promised your coach you’d be there. It means if you tell your teacher, teammates, boss, friends, or parents that you're going to do something, you'll follow through and do the very best you can. It means that if you sign a piece of paper saying you won't cheat, whether by using ChatGPT, copying from another student, or looking at your book or notes during a test, you don't. If you want to be honest, don't cheat, don't steal, and don't sell your character, your trustworthiness, or your reputation for pennies, because it's worth a fortune.

Does honesty and integrity sound like something you would want to install in your personal operating system? Your past is irrelevant. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, said, or the mistakes you’ve made. Starting today, be more truthful and act with integrity. Build up your courage and speak truthfully even when it is difficult.

Especially when it's difficult.

Start where you are, and do what you can. Progress is a process. Take small steps today that move you in the direction of being someone who can be trusted, relied upon, and respected. Just begin, and go forward.

The Benefits of Honesty

In psychology, there is a concept called self-betrayal. Self-betrayal happens when we act in ways that go against our own beliefs, our best values, or what we know to be right. It's like letting ourselves down by betraying what we stand for or the kind of person we want to be.

This can happen when you're trying to fit into a certain group or when you're pressured by friends to do, watch, or listen to things you don't want to. Maybe this happens during a stressful or difficult time, and instead of acting in ways that match the foundation we've discussed, you choose dishonesty, rudeness, disrespect, petty, jealous behavior, or gossip, anything that betrays the best of who you are.

Everybody does this, so it’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s important to learn how to identify it so that when you see yourself going off course or down a strange road, you can courageously and patiently redirect yourself toward your goals, your objectives, and the things that matter most. When people betray themselves, they often feel ashamed, disappointed, embarrassed, guilty, disconnected from themselves, and they may even lose some self-respect.

These feelings can't always be avoided, because nobody is perfect. The objective is growth and progress. As Polonius said in Shakespeare’s Hamlet: “To thine own self be true.” Don't be false or dishonest with yourself or others. Do the best you can to align your behavior with your values, beliefs, and character.

Trust Is Money in the Bank

When you act with integrity and honesty, it's like depositing money into the emotional bank accounts of your friends, teammates, teachers, parents, and siblings. You don't want to be bankrupt or in the red; instead, you want to be making regular deposits.

Your present and future relationships will significantly impact your academic success and your future professional success. So start today by challenging yourself to be more truthful and to act with integrity.

More Honesty = More Happiness

Adding more honesty to your communication, behavior, and relationships can be a powerful boost for your mental fitness. Studies show that when you choose honesty, you're not just lightening your conscience; you're also shedding layers of stress and anxiety.

Honesty frees your mind from the weight and worry that follow lies and deceit, paving the way for more genuine connections and inner peace. Peace is a sincere desire of the human soul.

Self-Respect

Being honest isn't just about telling the truth; it's about honoring yourself and what you stand for. When you stay true to your values and beliefs, you're not only building self-respect but also shaping a strong foundation for your integrity.

Self-respect doesn’t only refer to feeling good about yourself. It's about living a life that aligns with who you truly want to be, which brings more joy, more confidence, and a deeper, longer-lasting sense of happiness and fulfillment. Who doesn't want that?

You should equip yourself with every possible advantage to seize the present and future days. In the professional world, honesty is like a golden ticket to long-term success. Employers value people who act with integrity, honesty, and reliability, because they know that honesty breeds trust and respect. The same is true for you right now in your classroom and in your relationships with teachers, coaches, and principals. Honesty really is the best policy.

Take a quick and honest look at the foundation you're building today, and that you've been building over the past years. Are you building your personal foundation out of straw and sticks like the two unwise pigs, or are you building it out of granite, cement, and bricks, like the wise pig?

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