My amazing friends, what an absolutely genius question...
"How Do I Tune Out Drama?"
I'm thrilled to provide you with a few suggestions that will help you to tune out drama, and perhaps even more importantly than tuning out drama, or tuning out conflict, gossip, harsh judgments, back-biting, speaking poorly of others, instigating fighting and division, perhaps what is more important than that, is how we go about ‘Tuning into joy, into making life easier for yourself and others, into honesty, into helping each other, to being friendly, encouraging, supportive, complimentary, being patient with each other's weaknesses, allowing people some privacy, and room to make mistakes without being openly crucified by other people... how do we tune into a life that is more peaceful with others, and that ultimately is focused on things that actually matter and that build, instead of things that are fickle, that don't matter, and that ultimately destroy.
I'm reminded of a friend of mine, that while we were rock climbing and talking about life, he said to me "iuri, I've realized that we are the creators and destroyers of worlds."
Now this friend of mine was quite the philosopher, but in a way, I want you to clearly see the power that you hold in your hands, in your mind, and in your body. You my friend are made to create, Period!... and create you will, you must now decide what it is that you will sow in your life, and that of course will determine what you will reap. That my friend, is the law of the harvest. If you sow apples, you'll get apples. If you sow onions, that's what you'll get. Similarly, if you sow respect, fun, friendliness, positivity, and understanding, you'll find that you will indeed reap more of those things... of course there is no sure guarantee that this will work 100% of the time... in fact, I can guarantee that it won't, but it will dramatically improve your chances that you will get those things back.
A quote that I like to use all of the time is "If you want it, give it." Think that through for a second, and write that little quote in the walls of that lovely brain that sits atop that ingenious spinal cord of yours.
Ok, let's get to your brilliant question... How Do I Tune Out Drama?
- People, Places, and Things. Have you ever heard of AA? AA is an acronym for Alcoholics Anonymous. It's been around for a long time, but basically, it's a group of people who commit to helping each other overcome their alcohol or drug addictions. It's actually a beautiful thing. But over the years, these incredible individuals have come up with some sayings that are super helpful, and that help people to stay focused and not drink or use drugs. One of these awesome sayings is "People, Places, and Things," and the basic truth that is being communicated through this quote is that, when you want to really change something in your life in the short and especially in the long-term, change your people, your places, and your things. So for an alcoholic for example, this means, not hanging around with people who are drinking; it means minimizing your time in places where people go to drink; and changing the things you do, that encourage and drive you to drink. So, let's take this wisdom and apply it to your situation. Can you think of any people in your life that are constantly cooking up drama? By the way, while you're thinking of others, make sure you take a quick look inside as well, and make sure you're not the source of this immature and ineffective behavior. Can you think of the places where this drama is happening? Is it in the hallways of your school, or during lunch hour, or at the football game? Or is it happening on your snap, or instagram, or facebook, or other social media account? Are you involved in texting threads that have become sour and mean? Mi amigo, it's time for you to migrate away from those people, places, and things that are constantly stirring the pot, in negative and hurtful ways. Look, this is totally up to you of course. You are the creator of your life, you get to make the choices that either keep you firmly planted in a culture of drama, or that move you toward a much friendlier, more accepting, less gossipy and critical, and honestly, way more fun and way better for your relationships. So... remember that short saying, and if you're really interested in tuning out the drama long-term, make changes at the people, places, and things level. By the way, do this in a classy and honorable way, instead of going around sowing more drama, and telling everyone that you're no longer hanging out with so and so, because they were too much drama... I hope you can see, that you've just become part of the problem, know what I'm sayin'?
- Make a commitment right here and now, that you won't speak badly about other people! I mean it. You up for that? Make a decision here today, that when you speak of others, that you will do so in a respectful, understanding, and complimentary way. Be the kind of person that gives people a break, instead of the kind of person that is ready to pounce whenever someone makes a mistake, or acts in not so good ways. Be the kind of person that people enjoy seeing, because you simply practice these simple skills... you are friendly, you are interested in those people, and you're not afraid to compliment them or cheer for them and their success, and perhaps most of all, you are gentle with them in their moments of weakness. Look, your relationships and the social networks that you are building right now matter. Yes, friends can come and go, but listen, don't burn bridges, instead build off of your other friendships and relationships.
- Tune in to being a positive force! Guess, what, we're back to where we started... the best way to tune out Drama, is to tune in to the opposite of drama, and what is that? Well, it's to become a force for good, and to radiate that. In other words, I want you to become a hotspot for positivity and goodness... see what I did there with the hotspot thing? Pretty cool hum...? My hope for you, is that when others step into your atmosphere, they'll feel that gravitational force, and as a result feel at ease, feel safe, feel like smiling and laughing, and feel awesome for being around you. You can do this! All you need to do is be more dog! Think about how dogs do this? Their joy, playfulness, friendship, loyalty, excitement, and their willingness to do just send it, and do fun stuff with you... be more dog, and invest in building these simple skills into your life. I'm not expecting you to become a total pro at this by tomorrow... you've got a couple of weeks... okay, more like your entire lifetime, but just remember the things that I've shared with you here today, and work on them a little at a time. Don't worry about doing something that doesn't quite feel natural to you, or if they feel like a stretch... so what? We need to stretch, we need to grow in a direction that is wise and that will fill our life with friendships, success, and amazing relationships.
- People, Places and Things... "iuri you dufus, you already said that one?" I know, but this is also the best way for you to tune out drama, is to begin investing and literally placing yourself around the people, places, and things that have low drama... and by the way, I'm not talking about the drama club, cause I love those people, even though sometimes there is a little drama there, and honestly, in just about every organization or club, or team, there can be moments of selfishness, insecurity, and drama... but what I'm trying to say, is spend your time, energy, and focus on creating and investing in those people, places, and things that encourage you to feel great, and that you feel good when you're around them. Whether that's the cross country team, or orchestra, or drama club, or football, or whatever club or organization, go be a part of it, and reap the benefits.
Okay, I'm literally out of breath, but I hope that some of these ideas and strategies have inspired you to take a look in and do some work! Wise people look in and do the work.. Be one of those people, and be that hotspot that I talked about, and radiate vibes that say "hey when you're with me, it's safe, it's cool, it's friendly, it's positive, and it's going to be fun."
Remember, you are the creators and destroyers of worlds. Now get out there and create something memorable and awesome. Cheerio!